Episode 16 – “Days of Our Lives”
Snuggle up in your blankies, Horn-Heads, and tune into “Story Time With Hiro.” In this intro, our Jian regurgitates the heartwarming story of “The Monster Who Nearly Killed Herself by Tearing Her Own Wings Off”–this time in the form of a factory fresh OP.
Life drifts along happily for the 13s despite the APE-men’s admission that the Battle of Gran Crevasse wiped out sixty percent of their child-slave peers. The gang stands by in Mistilteinn–the stage for the next season of Days of Our FranXX. The AniMessenger experiences déjà vu as the characters crawl back into their soap opera hell-holes.
Zero Two frolics about her new prison, horns filed, annoyingly chipper, buzzing on some sort of Darling mania–guzzling honey, groping the only lesbian member of the cast, and goody-two-shoesing all over the place. All the boringness from DarliFra’s worst moments collect together in a yawn-inducing retention pool.
Don’t get too comfortable, ‘cuz episode sixteen’s got an action scene that puts The Avengers to shame:
Just to fortify the episode’s “calm before the storm” status, the de-beasted protagonist cuts off her Darling’s convo and fast-forwards to the obligatory Pistil-babe-hot-springs scene–
After the previous narrative build-up, the satisfying Hiro/Zero Two cat-and-mouse game, the compelling backstories, and the euphoric battle scenes, one can’t help but balk at the sheer monotony of the Parasites’ newfound passion for fishing, burning sticks, making dough, cutting flowers, and cultivating eating disorders. Of course, the unsupervised halcyon days will inevitably devolve into a grotesque Papa-backed dystopian horror flick–the sooner the better.
“Days of Our Lives,” aptly named after a soap opera, steps back from the war-zone, backsliding into the briny depths of episode eight–in other words, uninteresting schmaltz–a disappointing derailing of the hype train. This reviewer hopes that the remaining episodes follow our horny heroine’s moods and quickly ditches the manic happiness for depressive richness.
And, please remember:
~ Don’t Shoot the Messenger